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Masters of the Alphabet - EP

by The Shorty Tubbs

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1.
Way Too Wet 03:21
Where your focus goes, your juice flows. You have the hands of a pro and it shows. I'm a sure thing shorn of his clothes, happy to be led inside with his hose. And it looks like rain. Weeping wizards, this is heaven sent! You have sensitive documents, I am a master of the alphabet. Pleasure's such a pain, gonna burst into flames from rainbowing like I'm oversold. I'm getting rolled for my pot of gold. Yuppy dirts thing they can best me with tucked in shirts and RRSP's. What I lack in a future I give in a flash flood moment. You'll live... In a sliken rain, let's start a band called Way Too Wet. Hop on the flute and play a minuet, we'll tap a tune to the neighbours' regret. I'm not here to change, only to flow so to drench your desire. You're hot wired like a house on fire. I'm gonna dowse that mess in a glorious, dowse that mess in a glorious, dowse that mess in a glorious torrent of tenderness.
2.
Hecubus: Satan, as an angel you've got wings, but you can't sustain the mood. When it comes to commitment, dude, you have a devilish attitude. Satan: Yeah, I know I'm the gimp in a parade of lock step chimps And if you're looking for a fleet-footed flight risk, I'm super pimp. Hecubus: Supposin' as a lad ya had a bad burn in love And now you've set your heart to spurnin' the churnin' grace from above. Satan: What you talkin' 'bout, Hecubus, I fall in love twenty times a day. Now check out the cherubas (Hecubus interjects: Ooolala!) coming our way and think of something to say? Hecubus: Something like this? Hecubus and Satan: Dododododododododo dododododo Dodododododododododo dododododo (dodododododo) Dododododododododododo dododododododo dodododododododdo Dododododododododododo dodododododododododo Satan: I hit the Oracle up for an answer. She demurred and deferred to a dancer. Inside the booth the dancer whispers something About the truth if I could just do one thing: Love her long and soft until she's infirm. That makes me squirm 'cuz firm is how I feel tonight. As I become: Young Satan in love? Young Satan in love? Young Satan in love? Young Satan in love? (Hecubus and Satan in perfect teen-angel harmony) Young Satan in love! Young Satan in love! Young Satan in looooooooooove! Hecubus and Satan: Dododododododododo dododododo Dodododododododododo dododododo (dodododododo) Dododododododododododo dododododododo dodododododododdo Dododododododododododo dodododododododododo Dodododododo!
3.
My girlfriend was a vision of joy and beauty: When I was with her I wanted to run away and scream. Through my dreams streamed scenes of easy love, No false promises to back out of. Research trip to Tobago: Gone awry, Frisky a go-go. Met a madame who, for a free load and fee, Would have hers and her girlfriend’s sweet way with me. What could I say? I was lonely, And then we were three. My two very best friends in the way that you tend to me, Like waves to the sea. And then this useless guilt vied to overshadow Everything I hold close in my marrow. It’s just a story to sex up my old age, As the heard sleeps its way across the stage - That’s not my fate - If it’s not too late.
4.
5.
The situation always starts off cordial, Her peroxided hair's got me looking over my shoulder Goose bumping to the hits from the age of Schlitz and atomic bacon bits. I've got a meeting in an hour. If anyone knocks on that door in a manner we can't ignore, you just flew in from Bangalore on a good will tour of players and perfect scores. You're girlish lazy singsong lisp whisps along the midriff and drifts the day. Promise me we'll never do it and I will always want you in the awfullest way. Don't send that text to the wrong girl. So many tarts send my heart a'twirl.

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released October 21, 2013

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The Shorty Tubbs Fredericton, New Brunswick

An indie-rock, post-modern take on popular music from the past two centuries and counting, Shorty Tubbs straddles the universe like a colossus in short shorts. Looking for a descriptor with bite? Think sonic Doritos: oh so crunchy, practically too tasty, probably not good for you – but you don’t care. ... more

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